Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes!
This was a summer of lots of change. So many big changes in our lives, some happy,
some sad. This is long, but meaty. Hope you enjoy catching up with us. And if not, just look at the picture to try
to figure it all out.
I stopped updating the blog this summer, except for a post
for Griff’s 3rd birthday, around the time my Grandpa Arnold got sick
and quickly passed away in the beginning of June. He has been a profound influence on my life,
and it just didn’t seem right not to acknowledge his passing. But I just didn’t know what to say or how to
say it. In a nutshell, he taught me to
have integrity, to “trust but verify,” to be critical of what I hear, to have a
thicker skin and laugh at myself, to have a plan, to “think, damn it!,” to
welcome people into the family and treat them the same as everyone else, and to
play cutthroat games of cribbage and scrabble, among many other things. While it wasn’t unexpected that he passed
away, I did think we would get more warning.
But he went the way he wanted to, and for that I am happy. But I still pick up the phone to call him,
still think “I need to tell Grandpa about that,” and I miss him. But boy am I lucky for the 39 years I had
him as my Grandfather.
At the end of June, we had a family gathering to celebrate
his life. People told stories about how
he touched their lives and it was apparent that he touched lots of other people
profoundly. From stories of chasing
pesky teenagers through the house, into the yard, and then realizing the
neighbors were staring, to the time he decided throw a chair through the window
to allow air into his company’s building during a power outage, to the rare
instances when he told people he loved them, his pragmatism, his humor, his
intensity, and his sensitivity was evident.
It was such a wonderful way to acknowledge the strong impact he had on
all of our lives and to spend time with all these lovely people who I am lucky to have as part of my family.
Darrell wrapped up his work with PCS, where he has been for
the past 13 years and prepared for his new position at school in Carmel. Part of this involved getting a commuter car
that was safe and had good gas mileage for the long commute. After a lot of research and discussion, we
ended up with a VW Passat diesel which is super comfy and safe and gets about
40 mpg. Darrell started in service in
the first week of August and teaching the second week. He leaves the house between 5 and 6 to arrive
in time to prep for classes that start at 7:45.
If he can’t leave the school by 3:30 due to meetings afterward, he just
stays and works until 6 or 7 so avoid the terrible traffic in Monterey. So very long days for Darrell. As long as he remains satisfied with his job,
our plan is to move down that way when I finish my dissertation.
Darrell’s new position involves a lot of changes. He is teaching 7th grade life
sciences, as he was at his old school, but he is also teaching a high-school
level horticulture class. The rest of
his time is devoted to working with other teachers in the district to get them
using the wildlife habitat on the campus, helping to develop curriculum, and working
with the associated non-profit organization.
He is enjoying the challenges of new position and the creativity it
affords.
Around the time Darrell was starting his new position in the
first week of August, his Grandma Ryan fell ill. She went into the hospital and passed after
about a week. Like my Grandpa Arnold,
she got to live in her own house until the end of her life, something which was
very important to her. And she was lucky
to have her daughter, Darrell’s mom, living nearby, taking care of her, and
helping her to be able to stay in her home.
She was a very sweet woman, who played a mean game of Scrabble, and she
is dearly missed. I feel lucky that I got to know her and so did Griff. They had a sweet
gathering to celebrate her life in Indiana, where she grew up, which Darrell
was able to attend.
Since our sweet old dog, Barley, passed away last year, we
occasionally check the SPCA listing to see if they have any cute lab
puppies. But not with any seriousness. Because, really, do we have time to train a
puppy right now, with a 3 year old, a dissertation to write, and Darrell
commuting to Carmel? In July we saw a
listing for a beagle/lab puppy, one of the few lab mix puppies I had seen
there. What could it hurt to go and
look? We went down and it turns out he
had just been neutered that day, but he was at the vet’s office next door, and
the director of the SPCA, whose kids Darrell taught, took us over to meet
him. Of course a snuggly, sleepy puppy
that looked like a little version of Barley won our hearts and the director
told us that if we wanted him we should adopt him that evening since there were
lots of other calls about him. And so we
did. Um hum. Otis came home to join us. Griff wanted to name him “Cat,” in a show of
his burgeoning sense of humor that seems to take after his dad’s. It is nice to have a dog in our family
again. It doesn’t look like he will top
30 pounds and he is pretty high energy, although not so much of the small dog
energy or yapping (sorry for any small dog lovers, I grew up with large dogs so
I have a bias for them). He loves to
play and fetch and chew. He is pretty
well-behaved, except for when he isn’t.
And since we finally realized that we are just too darn busy to train
him well enough while he is young, we have hired a trainer to help us, and that
is working really well. He has been a
great addition to our family and great for Griff to learn to share the
spotlight, deal with someone in his space, and work out his frustrations in
non-physical ways.
Which brings me to our next change. Our family is going to grow by one more,
welcoming a baby in late Feb. Griff is
really excited about our family’s baby, he gives it kisses and hugs, talks to
it and loves to feel for kicks. We have
talked a lot about newborns, what they can and can’t do, how they need lots of
care and ways he can help with the baby.
He has several friends with newborn siblings, so I think that is
helpful. We are excited to welcome the
new little one, although both very distracted compared to when I was pregnant
with Griff. I am madly trying to finish drafts of all my dissertation chapters
by the end of Dec, Darrell is working long hours, and we have Griff and Otis to
take up our spare time. We aren’t going
to find out the sex until the baby is born, but Griff has suggested “Tractor,”
“Dukie” (the same name as the landlord’s dog), “Grasshopper,” and “Cricket,”
which has become the fetal name for the baby.
Griff is growing and making so many strides. He has been taking private swim lessons with
a friend’s daughter and this has been helping him hugely. He happily puts his head underwater now, can
swim about 8 feet on his own, and loves it.
It is great for his confidence and for practice in listening to
directions. He has also been riding his
balance bike practice in new places, in particular at the pump track, a dirt
track with turns and bumps to ride over.
He and his cousin have been having a wonderful time riding together
there, a great way to get them to do something together even with their age difference. I love watching Griff, the youngest little
one there, happily singing songs while he rides, or trying to organize everyone
to play red-light-green-light. I love
his honest, sweet nature. He also loves
to build and pretend various items in the yard or house are tools like
jackhammers or weed wackers, along with the appropriate noises. Something else Griff is really interested in
working on are letters and numbers. He is
really interested in them and can recognize most of the upper case letters and
sounds that go with them at this point.
And he loves to tell us how he spells his name and ask how other
people’s names are spelled. And he is
asking a lot of what if and how and why questions. I have definitely been stumped more than once
by his questions. He has been growing
several sweet friendships with several kids.
It really is amazing to be on this journey with him.
And that’s the news from our little universe!
Posts
Hey V., I'm so sorry to hear about Griff's grandparents and hope your families are doing well. Very excited, on the other hand, about the big new baby news!! Your family has been busy!! We're always thinking of you!
Wow, what an update! Sorry for your losses, it must have been a lot to take in so close together. Sounds like you have a lot of really positive things going on too - congrats on the pregnancy and new job and swimming and doggie and everything else!!
Yes, quite a summer. We definitely miss our grandparents, but feel lucky to have had them so long, too. And we are super excited about the new addition, amazed by all the strides Griff is making, as well as our puppy in the hands of a trainer.:) Now let's see if I can make the amazing stride of getting this first chapter off my desk and onto my adviser's... off I go!